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ha ha ill never tell's Journal

11th November, 2005. 2:59 pm. hahahaha

submersed-hollowTo you
I'm all I've left undone
I'm all I haven't won
Lift me up my soul's so hollow
Lift me up

You take
The breath you didn't make
What's left you did forsake
Lift me up my soul's so hollow
Lift me up my soul's so hollow

You can make me scream internally
You can make me breathe eternally
Yeah

You see
The things I cannot change
The things that make me plain
Lift me up my soul's so hollow
Lift me up

We've made
All from the sum of none
All that we have become
Lift me up my soul's so hollow
Lift me up my soul's so hollow

You can make me scream internally
You can make me breathe eternally

You can make me scream internally
You can make me breathe eternally
Yeah

Fill, fill what's in me
Fill, fill what's in you
Fill, fill what's in me
So my soul's not left so hollow

You can make me SCREAM
You can make me BREATHE

You can make me scream internally
You can make me breathe eternally

You can make me scream
You can make me breathe
You can make me scream
You can make me breathe, me breathe

Current mood: crazy.

Make Notes

23rd August, 2004. 2:52 pm. im coming home soon

i cant wait to see all my friends im coming home and might be home for 30 days i leave here aug 31

Current mood: ecstatic.

Make Notes

20th August, 2004. 8:54 am. what to do

"Wake Up"
I’m not sober all the time
You bring me down at least you try
Until we see this eye to eye
I don’t want you

I must be running out of luck
Cause you’re just not drunk enough to fuck
And now I’ve had it up to here
I don’t, I don’t want you

It took so long to see
You walked away from me
When I need you
Wake up I’m pounding on the door
I’m not the man I was before
Where the hell are you
When I need you
Wake up I’m pounding on the door
I won’t hurt you anymore
Where the hell are you
When I need you

I’m not angry all the time
You push me down at least you try
Until we see this eye to eye
I don’t want you

It took so long to see
You walked away from me
When I need you
Wake up I’m pounding on the door
I’m not the man I was before
Where the hell are you
When I need you
Wake up I’m pounding on the door
I won’t hurt you anymore
Where the hell are you
When I need you

It took so long to see
You walked away from me
When I need you

Wake up I’m pounding on the door
I’m not the man I was before
Where the hell are you
When I need you
Wake up I’m pounding on the door
I won’t hurt you anymore
Where the hell are you
When I need you
"(I Hate) Everything About You"
Every time we lie awake
After every hit we take
Every feeling that I get
But I haven’t missed you yet

Every roommate kept awake
By every sigh and scream we make
All the feelings that I get
But I still don’t miss you yet

Only when I stop to think about it

I hate everything about you
Why do I love you
I hate everything about you
Why do I love you

Every time we lie awake
After every hit we take
Every feeling that I get
But I haven’t missed you yet

Only when I stop to think about it

I hate everything about you
Why do I love you
I hate everything about you
Why do I love you

Only when I stop to think
About you, I know
Only when you stop to think
About me, do you know

I hate everything about you
Why do I love you
You hate everything about me
Why do you love me

I hate
You hate
I hate
You love me

I hate everything about you
Why do I love you

Current mood: confused.
Current music: god send me an angel- amanda perez.

Make Notes

16th August, 2004. 8:58 am. stuck in japan

its true i dont know when i will be coming home but i do know i would not mind staying here another year the moneys good and if i do exten ill be home for a few weeks then back here again and maybe just maybe i can get back with felicia and make things right between her and i if not then i will be home then to camp lagune for the rest of my tour in the marine corps who knows what tomrrow brings as we fight the futer and fuck our past and try to learn from them

Current mood: pissed off.
Current music: godsmack.

Read 1 Note -Make Notes

2nd August, 2004. 10:55 am. i write what i feel these go out to my ex

Blind rage -
You ripped the heart out of me
But you can’t see………..
What you are doing to me

It happens again
That its killing me
Inside my heart

My blind rage …….
It’s pushing you away …
Till your no longer…
In my life …….

I don’t wanna lose you..
But looks like I have


Feeling hollow

Feeling hollow
Feeling real
Think of that
And see how I feel

I feel so weak
I’m losing you….
It can’t happen again

I’m with out you
For the first time
I can see you don’t
Mean shit to me

Feeling hollow
With out you
Feeling real
that’s how I feel

Current mood: creative.
Current music: my own techno.

Make Notes

2nd August, 2004. 10:40 am. i hate felicia yet i care about her


Adopt Your Own Emo Kid!



Adopt Your Own Emo Kid!


Current mood: confused.

Make Notes

2nd August, 2004. 10:23 am. i hate my ex

what do you do when you breake up
do you try to get that person back?yes
do you feel for them more with out the or not?when im with out
what do you say to them?i tell them how i feel
do you tell them how you feel?no i just said that
why do you go back?b/c i wanna know y
if you do go back is every thing the same?nothing ever better for me
would you try to put them though a lot of pain?hell yes b/c im spitefull
would you make ther lif suck?yes and i got frieds who will do it
would you still care and why?yes b/c its hard to explane
do you drink yourprobles away? explane why?yes it helps forget what the problem was
what do you do when you feelin down?inline skate
what do you do to forget them?drink write music and burn all there pic that i have
can you erase your mind?yes i can

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Current mood: disappointed.
Current music: dont speake--nodought.

Make Notes

2nd August, 2004. 9:05 am. find me lol

The \\
Last Cigarette:20 min ago
Last Alcoholic Drink:like 9 hours ago
Last Car Ride:2 hours ago
Last Kiss:with the ex friday night
Last Good Cry:no tears from me
Last Library Book:whats a library??
Last book bought:book????
Last Book Read:me read i have add
Last Movie Seen in Theatres:last samuri
Last Movie Rented:40 days 40 nights
Last Cuss Word Uttered:fuck i cant rember
Last Beverage Drank:cocacola
Last Food Consumed:bk breafest
Last Crush:on my ex felicia
Last Phone Call:to my friend alicia
Last TV Show Watched:dont watch tv im in okinawa japan
Last Time Showered:530 am this morrning
Last Shoes Worn:combat boots
Last CD Played:alicia keys dairy of alicia keys
Last Item Bought:2 pairs of pants
Last Download:poisin ever rose has its thorn
Last Annoyance:1230 pm yesterday ex girl friens came bye
Last Disappointment:about 330 pm yesterday watching my ex leave
Last Soda Drank:cola
Last Thing Written:i figured u wote it my self
Last Key Used:room key
Last Words Spoken:to whom???
Last Sleep:last night in a drunkin state
Last Ice Cream Eaten:last night for my toung ring
Last Chair Sat In:my office chair
Last Webpage Visited:livejournal.com

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Current mood: drained.

Make Notes

29th July, 2004. 7:54 am. fuck the us marine corps

i am not coming home as planed on july 31 i have to do something for the next 2v weeks and then ill be homeso that sux b/c i wont get enough time to spend with friends and famly that i havent seen in over a fucking year b/c i have been in japan

Current mood: pissed off.
Current music: fuck the usmc.

Read 3 Notes -Make Notes

23rd July, 2004. 10:38 am. mixed emotions

"Feelin' Way Too Damn Good"

I missed you so much
That I begged you to fly and see me
You must've broke down
Coz you finally said that would
But now that you're here
I just feel like I'm constantly dreaming

Coz something's gotta go wrong
Coz I'm feelin' way to damn good

For 48 hours I don't think that we left my hotel room
Should show you the sights
Coz I'm sure that I said that I would
We gotta make love just one last time in the shower

Well something's gotta go wrong
Coz I'm feelin' way to damn good

And it's like, every time I turn around
I fall in love and find my heart face down and
Where it lands is where it should
This time it's like
The two of us should probably start to fight
Coz something's gotta go wrong
Coz I'm feeling way to dam good, oh
Feelin' way too damn good

Sometimes I think best if left in the memory
It's better kept inside than left for good
Lookin' back each time they tried to tell me
Well something's gotta go wrong
Coz I'm feelin' way too damn good

And it's like, every time I turn around
I fall in love and find my heart face down and
Where it lands is where it should
This time it's like
The two of us should probably start to fight
Coz something's gotta go wrong
Coz I'm feeling way to dam good, oh
Feelin' way too damn good
Oh, oh, feelin' way too damn good

I missed you so much
That I begged you to fly and see me
You must've broke down
Coz you finally said that would
But now that you're here
I just feel like I'm constantly dreaming

Coz something's gotta go wrong
Coz I'm feelin' way to damn good

And it's like, every time I turn around
I fall in love and find my heart face down and
Where it lands is where it should
This time it's like
The two of us should probably start to fight
Coz something's gotta go wrong
Coz I'm feeling way to damn good, oh, oh
Feelin' way too damn good
(I missed you so much
That I begged you to fly and see me)
Feelin' way too damn good
(I missed you so much
That I begged you to fly and see me)

Current mood: confused.
Current music: nirvana.

Make Notes

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